{"id":15653,"date":"2017-10-28T19:27:23","date_gmt":"2017-10-28T19:27:23","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/armytimes\/uncategorized\/2017\/10\/28\/special-operations-spouses-share-demanding-duties-on-the-home-front\/"},"modified":"2026-08-08T01:50:54","modified_gmt":"2026-08-08T01:50:54","slug":"special-operations-spouses-share-demanding-duties-on-the-home-front","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/armytimes\/news\/your-army\/2017\/10\/28\/special-operations-spouses-share-demanding-duties-on-the-home-front\/","title":{"rendered":"Special operations spouses share demanding duties on the home front"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

On any given day, thousands of special operations forces are deployed to more than 100 countries across the globe. More than half of those come from the Army\u2019s Special Forces.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And for many of those deployed in small groups in faraway places, a family waits at home for that soldier to return.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Events in recent weeks highlight both the triumphs and tragedies faced by family members of special operations forces \u2014 from the long overdue Medal of Honor for then-Sgt. Gary \u201cMike\u201d Rose <\/a>for his actions as a Special Forces medic in Laos, to the deaths of four special operations soldiers <\/a>in Africa earlier this month, including two Green Berets.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Amid these events, a small group of dedicated spouses met this week, as they do each year, to honor family members who work on the home front both within their own military community and beyond.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The nature of special operations deployments, in small units, frequently throughout a career, can isolate the soldiers and their spouses, making connection and support between members even more important, the women said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Two of the command staff spouses shared their own experiences.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Suzanne Tovo, the wife of Lt. Gen. Kenneth Tovo, commander of U.S. Army Special Operations Command, has been married to her husband for 32 years.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She still remembers when her husband, then with the 82nd Airborne Division, came home and asked if she\u2019d like to go to Okinawa shortly before submitting his application to try out for Special Forces.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

At that time, family readiness groups didn\u2019t exist. Spouses in the special operations community were very much in the dark, she said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And the culture was quite different. As an officer\u2019s wife in the 82nd, she was expected to attend certain social functions only with other officers\u2019 wives. But as the wife of a young Special Forces officer, both officers and enlisted wives mixed because the teams were so tightly woven and worked so closely together.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Only other Special Forces spouses understood what the constant deployments were like, she said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Angela Abernethy, the wife of Command Sgt. Maj. Robert Abernethy, also with U.S. Army Special Operations Command, has been in the community for seven years and married to her husband for the past four.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She said she knew little about special operations when she first arrived, but the other families were more than welcoming.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt was powerful,\u201d Abernethy said. \u201cThey took me in, they held my hand. They showed me how to work through deployments.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The two women have been institutionalizing much of their own experiences with the help of other spouses, traveling to each of the far-flung Special Forces groups and meeting with spouses and family readiness groups.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWe\u2019re visiting units so we stay in touch with spouses going through active deployment,\u201d Tovo said. \u201cWe\u2019re ensuring they have everything they need and are connected.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They\u2019ve also helped create a program called ONE TEAM that connects the families of students going through highly demanding Special Forces training with families of current operating SF soldiers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This past week, the women emceed an event to honor fellow spouses for their often-unheralded work in the community.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Each of the following spouses received the Martha Raye Award for their contributions:<\/p>\n\n\n\n