{"id":31670,"date":"2023-01-17T19:06:16","date_gmt":"2023-01-17T19:06:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/armytimes\/uncategorized\/2023\/01\/17\/8-crayon-flavors-marines-would-actually-enjoy-eating\/"},"modified":"2026-08-08T21:07:04","modified_gmt":"2026-08-08T21:07:04","slug":"8-crayon-flavors-marines-would-actually-enjoy-eating","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/armytimes\/off-duty\/military-culture\/2023\/01\/17\/8-crayon-flavors-marines-would-actually-enjoy-eating\/","title":{"rendered":"8 crayon flavors Marines would actually enjoy eating"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There are a few simple truths in life: The Earth is round. The Sun is hot. Humans need oxygen to breathe. And Marines love to eat crayons.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">No one is quite sure where or how that last fact came to be, but as far back as contemporary lore goes, nary a devil dog can say they haven\u2019t heard at least one joke about their beloved Corps being full of colorful wax-snack eaters.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And while several <a href=\"https:\/\/www.militarytimes.com\/off-duty\/military-culture\/2020\/08\/05\/someone-finally-made-edible-crayons-for-marines\/?utm_source=clavis\" target=\"_blank\">enterprising boots<\/a> have made novelty crayons that indeed are safe for consumption, these chocolate or cake-based treats don\u2019t take into account what flavors would really appeal to a die-hard Marine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">These are some of the best.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><b>Spam and Eggs<\/b><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There\u2019s nothing quite like a breakfast of canned pig meat laced with sodium nitrite. And if you\u2019ve got eggs on hand to go with it, you\u2019ve got a happy Marine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><b>Room-temperature Pabst Blue Ribbon<\/b><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ask any Marine, nothing says \u201cOohrah America\u201d quite like a room-temperature PBR. Nary a night of barracks mayhem <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marinecorpstimes.com\/off-duty\/military-culture\/2022\/12\/01\/marine-vet-gets-lakers-crowd-hopped-up-by-chugging-from-prosthetic\/\" target=\"_blank\">was fueled without a little warm beer.<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><b>The Color Red<\/b><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A Marine\u2019s favorite color is also the best flavor: Red. \u2018Nuff said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><b>Mud<\/b><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Marines undoubtedly know how to get down and dirty better, perhaps, than any other branch. There is no chance that anyone who sports the Eagle, Globe and Anchor didn\u2019t develop a little fondness for the taste of mud.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><b>Skoal Original Fine Cut Wintergreen<\/b><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Despite the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marinecorpstimes.com\/news\/your-marine-corps\/2015\/12\/30\/hawaii-based-troops-face-new-tobacco-ban\/\" target=\"_blank\">obvious health issues presented by tobacco<\/a>, dip is perhaps as synonymous with ground combat as muddy brogans. That fresh and spicy wintergreen is by far the preferred flavor. A crayon of this variety will take you right back to boot camp, for better or worse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><b>Dry Socks and Ibuprofen<\/b><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A change of socks and some pain meds are just what the doc ordered. After a wet ruck march, there is nothing better than the feeling of fresh knits on dry piggies and the muscle-relaxing qualities of ibuprofen as you hit the hay.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><b>Blood of the Enemy<\/b><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">This is not to say that Marines are vampires, but, as far as crayon flavors go, the blood of the enemy is pretty sweet. We think Marine <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marinecorpstimes.com\/news\/your-marine-corps\/2019\/06\/26\/chesty-puller-is-a-legend-for-his-5-navy-crosses-heres-how-he-earned-his-silver-star\/\" target=\"_blank\">Gens. Chesty Puller<\/a>, Jim Mattis and Smedley Butler would agree.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><b>Chili-Mac<\/b><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Chili-Mac is <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marinecorpstimes.com\/news\/your-army\/2018\/02\/21\/its-official-the-pizza-mre-is-back\/\" target=\"_blank\">everybody\u2019s favorite MRE. <\/a>But it holds a special place among Marines because, let\u2019s face it, they\u2019re basically all still 11 years old, and macaroni with meat sauce is as elementary as it gets.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>If crayons really came in Marine flavors, these would be the top choices.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":63862,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"single-post-observation-post","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_yoast_wpseo_meta-robots-noindex":"","_yoast_wpseo_meta-robots-nofollow":"","_yoast_wpseo_canonical":"","_acf":"","_yoast_wpseo_primary_category":73,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","_smg_distribution_targets":[]},"categories":[100,23,93,73,12,25,13,70],"tags":[],"coauthors":[3305],"class_list":["post-31670","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-daily-news-roundup","category-home","category-middle-column","category-military-culture","category-news","category-newsletters","category-off-duty","category-your-army"],"acf":{"subheadline":"","legacy_arc_id":"DIWNQBWAFJD5NLFTPWP6BX6IPE","arc_canonical_url":"\/off-duty\/military-culture\/2023\/01\/17\/8-crayon-flavors-marines-would-actually-enjoy-eating\/","remove_feature_photo":false,"is_sponsored":false,"subtype":"observation-post","redirect_url":"","disable_inline_ads":false,"native_logo_pretext":"Presented By:"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v26.0 (Yoast SEO v28.1) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>8 crayon flavors Marines would actually enjoy eating - Army Times<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"If crayons really came in Marine flavors, these would be the top choices.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"8 crayon flavors Marines would actually enjoy eating\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"If crayons really came in Marine flavors, these would be the top choices.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/armytimes\/off-duty\/military-culture\/2023\/01\/17\/8-crayon-flavors-marines-would-actually-enjoy-eating\/\" 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