On the rarest of occasions, one encounters the type of cuisine that transcends earthly existence, a culinary delicacy that catapults all five senses through time and space and into unparalleled euphoria. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Such is the case with the fine dining at Al Udeid Air Base in Qatar, according to a series of recent Facebook posts that shine a light on a bevy of the base\u2019s delectable menu choices. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
In an effort to ensure our servicemen and women know the best dishes to satisfy the insatiable palate that protecting freedom induces, we explored the most mouthwatering five-star dishes \u201cThe Deid\u201d has to offer. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
1. SNUG AS A BUG<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n
You may have had cereal before, but you\u2019ve never had bug-infused cereal. Sprinkle some of these lucky charms<\/i> on your bowl for extra protein, succulent flavor and \u2014 one could argue \u2014 spiritual fulfillment. <\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n
Scott knows what we\u2019re talking about. \u201cNom nom nom nom,\u201d he says. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
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2. THE LUCK OF THE IRISH<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n
What could possibly be more representative of the Emerald Isle than beef stew? Green beef stew, of course. In Al Udeid, every day is St. Patrick\u2019s Day. One bite from this generous course will leave your taste buds screaming \u201cc\u00e9ad m\u00edle f\u00e1ilte in my mouth!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
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3. MY SORTA AORTA<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n
There is American roast beef and then there\u2019s Al Udeid roast beef, the pinnacle of sustenance. Served with full blown veins and arteries, you might look at your plate and think, \u201cThat\u2019s a f—ing heart, dude.\u201d But rest assured, the only heart in the equation will be yours, which will be busy fluttering as the pungent aroma possesses your very being.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Scrumptious!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
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4. OCS<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n
No, not Officer Candidate School, but Oatmeal Chicken Surprise, because why devour a bland old bowl of oats for breakfast when \u2014 boom! \u2014 you can be punched in the face with a poultry revelation? <\/p>\n\n\n\n
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5. SLIMY YET SATISFYING<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n
For the more health-conscious service member, try this lighter option and say \u201chakuna matata\u201d while you rid yourself of all worries \u2014 and every bite of grub. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
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6. THE ROCK OF AGES<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n
Have you, like so many, been dying to change your look to resemble one of those diseased greyscale, rock people on \u201cGame of Thrones\u201d? What better way to achieve success in the endeavor than eating actual <\/i>rocks? It might be a tad crunchy, so wash it down with your favorite Rip It. <\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n
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7. THE GREEN MILE<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n
For those needing something quick and on-the-go, grab a sandwich that not only satisfies the meat and bread portions of the food pyramid, but greens as well. The splashing of olive drab in sandwiches is reminiscent of the camouflage uniforms donned by the service members devouring them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But seriously, this is probably not good.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Help us, Upton Sinclair<\/a>. You\u2019re our only hope. <\/p>\n\n\n\n