{"id":68069,"date":"2023-04-28T01:12:34","date_gmt":"2023-04-28T01:12:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/marinecorpstimes\/uncategorized\/2023\/04\/28\/whats-great-about-being-military-kids-from-two-marine-dads\/"},"modified":"2026-08-08T15:34:59","modified_gmt":"2026-08-08T15:34:59","slug":"whats-great-about-being-military-kids-from-two-marine-dads","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/marinecorpstimes\/opinion\/2023\/04\/28\/whats-great-about-being-military-kids-from-two-marine-dads\/","title":{"rendered":"What\u2019s great about being military kids, from two Marine dads"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">April is the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.defense.gov\/Spotlights\/Month-of-the-Military-Child\/\" target=\"_blank\">Month of the Military Child<\/a>, set aside to celebrate military children and to recognize the challenges they face in their own lives as part of their parents\u2019 service. We are two retired Marines who\u2019ve been friends for 27 years, and fathers whose kids grew up together.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">By writing this, we can help you explain the upside of life as a military child, when a well-meaning outsider asks you, \u201cIsn\u2019t being in uniform hard on your children?\u201d We want to celebrate the good things that come from growing up within the military \u2014 despite multiple moves and the stress of parents being absent, and sometimes deployed \u2014 including the strength, independence and resilience<b> <\/b>we\u2019ve seen grow in our own children.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And if you\u2019re just starting your family, in the early years of your service, and wondering if the sacrifice of time away will hurt your kids, we\u2019d like to share with you the gifts you are giving them: lifetime membership in a close-knit community that welcomes newcomers and makes them feel at home, in an era when many Americans don\u2019t know their neighbors. It also nurtures in them a lifetime allegiance to something larger than themselves, and an up-close example from their parents of how to live their ideals.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Between<b> <\/b>the two of us, we have seven wonderful kids who have moved at least a dozen times, changed schools more than 30 times, and parted ways with too many friends to count. Yet the military lifestyle helped them grow into confident, accomplished young adults <i>because <\/i>of their experiences, not in spite of them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"2592\" height=\"1728\" src=\"\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/Paul-and-Kids-75RR.JPG.jpg\" alt=\"Paul Cucinotta with his children Marissa, Nick, Joey, and Sam in Fort Benning, Ga., on Sept. 28, 2007.\" class=\"wp-image-106947\" srcset=\"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/Paul-and-Kids-75RR.JPG.jpg 2592w, https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/Paul-and-Kids-75RR.JPG.jpg?resize=300,200 300w, https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/Paul-and-Kids-75RR.JPG.jpg?resize=768,512 768w, https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/Paul-and-Kids-75RR.JPG.jpg?resize=1024,683 1024w, https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/Paul-and-Kids-75RR.JPG.jpg?resize=1536,1024 1536w, https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/Paul-and-Kids-75RR.JPG.jpg?resize=2048,1365 2048w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 2592px) 100vw, 2592px\" \/><figcaption class=\"wp-element-caption\">Paul Cucinotta with his children Marissa, Nick, Joey, and Sam in Fort Benning, Ga., on Sept. 28, 2007. (Photo courtesy of Paul Cucinotta)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Deployments were the most challenging, more for them than us. We had our mission to keep our focus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">For them, imagining what we were experiencing and \u201cnot knowing\u201d often became a negative distraction. Collectively, the two of us spent roughly 2,000 nights apart from them \u2014 nights when we didn\u2019t eat dinner with them, hear about their days or tuck them into bed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">We missed their soccer games, teacher conferences, sad and happy moments, proud accomplishments, as well as important milestones and events in their lives. We were absent for birthdays, special occasions, Mother\u2019s and Father\u2019s Days, holy days and holidays. Our kids laughed without us and cried without us. Some years they even grew up physically and emotionally \u2014 without us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yet they somehow found refuge with each other and the military community surrounding them. Unfortunately, the community outside the gates didn\u2019t really understand what they were going through.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">On a rare occasion when Paul picked his daughter Marissa up from school, her friends remarked, \u201cwe didn\u2019t even think you had a dad. Why is he gone so much?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Writing about these experiences isn\u2019t always easy, because it evokes raw emotions and conjures up painful memories. Especially when it comes to our kids, and what they experienced, too. It is difficult to personally convey their courage and selfless sacrifice in the face of adversity to anyone outside of our own immediate families.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">We don\u2019t share this with you to elicit sympathy or pity. Quite the contrary \u2014 in a lot of ways our children \u2014 Marissa, Luke, Karl, Nick, Joey, Jack, and Sam \u2014 are better human beings as a result of the challenges they faced as military kids.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Yes, thousands of children of deployed troops are without their mother or father right now, but when military families move and start over, they have other military families to lean on for support \u2014 the kind of support system few Americans have in any part of the country. When someone asks, \u201cwhy is your mom, or dad, gone so much?\u201d we encourage you to tell them: defending our country, but don\u2019t worry. We\u2019ve got lots of extended family \u2014 our military community \u2014 keeping watch for us back home.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><i>Paul Cucinotta and Kevin Schmiegel are retired Marine colonels who have 47 years of service between them. They previously led three national military and veteran nonprofits and recently co-founded a social impact company called ZeroMils.<\/i><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Have an opinion?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><i>This article is an Op-Ed and as such, the opinions expressed are those of the author. If you would like to respond, or have an editorial of your own you would like to submit, please <\/i><a href=\"mailto:opinions@militarytimes.com\"><i>email us<\/i><\/a><i>.<\/i><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><i>Want more perspectives like this sent straight to you? <\/i><a href=\"https:\/\/link.militarytimes.com\/join\/5b9\/sign-up-opinion\"><i>Subscribe to get our Commentary &amp; Opinion newsletter<\/i><\/a><i> once a week.<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Two retired Marines recognize the sacrifices their children made while they were serving to mark the Month of the Military Child.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":106941,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_yoast_wpseo_meta-robots-noindex":"","_yoast_wpseo_meta-robots-nofollow":"","_yoast_wpseo_canonical":"","_acf":"","_yoast_wpseo_primary_category":14,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","_smg_distribution_targets":[]},"categories":[77,101,23,93,25,14],"tags":[],"coauthors":[6991,6993],"class_list":["post-68069","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-commentary","category-daily-news-roundup","category-home","category-middle-column","category-newsletters","category-opinion"],"acf":{"subheadline":"","legacy_arc_id":"CVT5XXO4K5D43ONU2MMLONGSUA","arc_canonical_url":"\/opinion\/commentary\/2023\/04\/28\/whats-great-about-being-military-kids-from-two-marine-dads\/","remove_feature_photo":false,"is_sponsored":false,"subtype":"","redirect_url":"","disable_inline_ads":false,"native_logo_pretext":"Presented By:"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v26.0 (Yoast SEO v28.1) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>What\u2019s great about being military kids, from two Marine dads - Marine Corps Times<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Two retired Marines recognize the sacrifices their children made while they were serving to mark the Month of the Military Child.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/militarytimes\/opinion\/2023\/04\/28\/whats-great-about-being-military-kids-from-two-marine-dads\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"What\u2019s great about being military kids, from two Marine dads\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Two retired Marines recognize the sacrifices their children made while they were serving to mark the Month of the Military Child.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/marinecorpstimes\/opinion\/2023\/04\/28\/whats-great-about-being-military-kids-from-two-marine-dads\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Marine Corps Times\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2023-04-28T01:12:34+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2026-08-08T15:34:59+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Kevin Schmiegel, Paul Cucinotta\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Kevin Schmiegel, Paul Cucinotta\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" 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