{"id":87574,"date":"2018-11-20T14:35:52","date_gmt":"2018-11-20T14:35:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/militarytimes\/uncategorized\/2018\/11\/20\/is-your-loved-one-deployed-during-the-holidays-military-spouses-share-their-survival-tips\/"},"modified":"2026-08-08T08:47:51","modified_gmt":"2026-08-08T08:47:51","slug":"is-your-loved-one-deployed-during-the-holidays-military-spouses-share-their-survival-tips","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/militarytimes\/commentary\/2018\/11\/20\/is-your-loved-one-deployed-during-the-holidays-military-spouses-share-their-survival-tips\/","title":{"rendered":"Is your loved one deployed during the holidays? Military spouses share their survival tips"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I recently spoke to a friend about our <a href=\"https:\/\/www.militarytimes.com\/spouse\/2017\/07\/08\/home-front-help-14-tips-for-dealing-with-deployment-from-spouses-who-ve-been-there\/\" target=\"_blank\">upcoming deployment <\/a>right before the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.militarytimes.com\/pay-benefits\/mil-money\/2017\/12\/28\/8-tips-for-military-families-to-beat-post-holiday-debt\/\" target=\"_blank\">holidays<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">She had a brilliant idea: Celebrate everything Chris is going to miss \u2014 birthdays, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc. \u2014before he deploys.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cHave Turkey and pumpkin pie one day, then Kylee\u2019s birthday cake the following day.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">How brilliant is this? Not once have I actually thought about celebrating <a href=\"https:\/\/www.militarytimes.com\/spouse\/2017\/11\/16\/survey-family-separation-concerns-top-pay-and-benefits-as-key-issue-for-troops-spouses\/\" target=_blank>missed holidays<\/a> during the 20 years we have been together and a few deployments under our belt.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Of course, I was very excited about this, and I want to share it with other military spouses.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So, I asked a few military spouses to share their ideas during a holiday deployment, and, hopefully, we can pass along the holiday spirit from one military spouse to another.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><b>Don\u2019t let traditions slip<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The holidays aren\u2019t the same when your significant other isn\u2019t home. I tend to decorate less, bake less and, overall, do less. Sometimes we let our holiday traditions slip because our spirit is stuck on deployment survival. Whether you have children or not, don\u2019t be Mr. Scrooge and settle with McDonald\u2019s.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cI really try to focus on making it as special as I can for my girls and I. I want to create amazing memories for them to remember. Just because daddy can\u2019t be here with us doesn\u2019t mean it can\u2019t be special,\u201d said Whitney, who is married to a Special Forces officer. \u201cWe make pizzelles, which I have been baking since I was a little girl, pick out our own Christmas tree and drive around town looking at Christmas lights.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And, &#8220;we continue our Christmas baking and our traditional Christmas dinner. It\u2019s important to keep traditions alive despite daddy\u2019s absence.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I also recommend not skipping the holiday card, and instead create a fun twist to the traditional card.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Have fun with it, and spread laughter to your family and friends when they open this gem.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1200\" height=\"777\" src=\"\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/ARM-cordova-commentary-web.jpg.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-90996\" srcset=\"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/ARM-cordova-commentary-web.jpg.jpg 1200w, https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/ARM-cordova-commentary-web.jpg.jpg?resize=300,194 300w, https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/ARM-cordova-commentary-web.jpg.jpg?resize=768,497 768w, https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/ARM-cordova-commentary-web.jpg.jpg?resize=1024,663 1024w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1200px) 100vw, 1200px\" \/><figcaption class=\"wp-element-caption\">During a deployment, military families should try to continue their holiday traditions, including sending out holiday cards that incorporate the deployed service member. (Courtesy of Maria Cordova)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And, guess what? Our <a href=\"https:\/\/www.militarytimes.com\/spouse\/2017\/02\/04\/from-fast-friends-to-the-daddy-board-how-one-army-wife-tackles-her-husband-s-deployment\/\" target=_blank>daddy board<\/a> showed up to a pumpkin patch and a Thanksgiving feast, and he was there on Christmas morning and rang in the New Year with us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><b>Pen a handwritten note and take pictures<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cI wrote handwritten letters and emailed every day. Raylee (our 5-year-old munchkin) and I snapped daily pictures,\u201d said Michelle Tangi, who is married to a Navy petty officer first class.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cEvery day is an adventure without him, and pictures are windows into our holiday cheer even when we are apart,\u201d she added. &#8220;These small gestures help Raymond to know we are enjoying the season.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Kristen Zeegers said, \u201cMy family would pull up a picture of my husband on our phone when we took pictures. I have a picture of me smiling with him on my phone while I was in [labor and delivery] with preeclampsia! It made him feel a part of it all, and it\u2019s special to look back on.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\t<aside class=\"smg-interstitial-link wp-block-smg-interstitial-link\">\n\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/militarytimes\/spouse\/2017\/02\/04\/from-fast-friends-to-the-daddy-board-how-one-army-wife-tackles-her-husband-s-deployment\/\" class=\"smg-interstitial-link__inner\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"smg-interstitial-link__media\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"300\" height=\"200\" src=\"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/maria-cordova-01.jpg.jpg?w=300\" class=\"smg-interstitial-link__image wp-post-image\" alt=\"\" \/>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"smg-interstitial-link__content\">\n\t\t\t\t<span class=\"smg-interstitial-link__kicker\">Related<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t<h3 class=\"smg-interstitial-link__title\">From fast friends to the \u2018Daddy Board,\u2019 how one Army wife tackles her husband&#8217;s deployment<\/h3>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"smg-interstitial-link__excerpt\">This Navy brat and Army spouse is no stranger to deployment &#8230; but it&#039;s her first with two young daughters<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/a>\n\t<\/aside>\n\t\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><b>Make time and connect<\/b><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cBeing able to have regular contact with FaceTime or a call brings normalcy, which makes us feel better connected,\u201d said Elissa Bryan, a military spouse and photographer currently stationed in Seoul, South Korea. \u201cThe exchanging of care packages also goes a long way for us to feel like the other person is there. Usually, it\u2019s silly small things. Just a reminder that there is someone on the other side of the world that loves you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Kristin Harder, who is married to Army Sgt. 1st Class Eric Harder, says she plans to spend the holidays with family. She echoes the importance of being around grandparents, aunts and cousins to continue to make great memories and holiday traditions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cAlways make sure to include your kids in conversations and make sure that each get a chance to talk with the deployed parent one-on-one,&#8221; adds Whitney, whose husband is a Special Forces officer. &#8220;I know for my kids, it is always special when they get to have the phone and talk with daddy and tell him all about their day.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"579\" height=\"394\" src=\"\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/MIL-CORDOVA-MUG-092517.jpg.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-45574\" srcset=\"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/MIL-CORDOVA-MUG-092517.jpg.jpg 579w, https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/MIL-CORDOVA-MUG-092517.jpg.jpg?resize=300,204 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 579px) 100vw, 579px\" \/><figcaption class=\"wp-element-caption\">(Courtesy of Maria Cordova)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><i>Maria Cordova is an Army wife, Navy brat, mom of two beautiful girls, member of Team Red, White and Blue, and author of \u201cUnsung Heroes\u201d and \u201cThe ABCs of the Army,\u201d two children\u2019s books available at <\/i><a href=\"http:\/\/amazon.com\/\" target=_blank><i>Amazon.com<\/i><\/a><i>. She\u2019s online at <\/i><a href=\"http:\/\/mariacordova.com\/\" target=_blank><i>MariaCordova.com<\/i><\/a><i>.<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I asked a few military spouses to share their ideas during a holiday deployment, and, hopefully, we can pass along the holiday spirit from one military spouse to another.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":90995,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_yoast_wpseo_meta-robots-noindex":"","_yoast_wpseo_meta-robots-nofollow":"","_yoast_wpseo_canonical":"","_acf":"","_yoast_wpseo_primary_category":97,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","_smg_distribution_targets":{"4":{"categories":["commentary","opinion","spouse","daily-news-roundup","newsletters"],"primary_category":"commentary"},"5":{"categories":["commentary","opinion","spouse","daily-news-roundup","newsletters"],"primary_category":"commentary"},"6":{"categories":["commentary","opinion","spouse","daily-news-roundup","newsletters"],"primary_category":"commentary"},"7":{"categories":["commentary","opinion","spouse","daily-news-roundup","newsletters"],"primary_category":"commentary"}}},"categories":[97,23,17],"tags":[],"coauthors":[530],"class_list":["post-87574","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-commentary","category-spouse","category-opinion"],"acf":{"subheadline":"","legacy_arc_id":"2QTPHRTJBBBO3FVC3YSNIYCS2Q","arc_canonical_url":"\/opinion\/commentary\/2018\/11\/20\/is-your-loved-one-deployed-during-the-holidays-military-spouses-share-their-survival-tips\/","remove_feature_photo":false,"is_sponsored":false,"subtype":"","redirect_url":"","disable_inline_ads":false,"native_logo_pretext":"Presented By:"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v26.0 (Yoast SEO v28.1) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Is your loved one deployed during the holidays? Military spouses share their survival tips - Military Times<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"I asked a few military spouses to share their ideas during a holiday deployment, and, hopefully, we can pass along the holiday spirit from one military spouse to another.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Is your loved one deployed during the holidays? 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