{"id":59248,"date":"2022-03-03T17:37:58","date_gmt":"2022-03-03T17:37:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/navytimes\/uncategorized\/2022\/03\/03\/building-a-social-network-in-the-civilian-world\/"},"modified":"2026-08-08T11:09:13","modified_gmt":"2026-08-08T11:09:13","slug":"building-a-social-network-in-the-civilian-world","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/one.sightlinemg.com\/navytimes\/education-transition\/2022\/03\/03\/building-a-social-network-in-the-civilian-world\/","title":{"rendered":"Building a social network in the civilian world"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">For many service members and their families, the U.S. military is a one-stop shop: Work, school, shopping and social activities are often on base, and it is easy to build connections and make friends who become like family.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But what happens when military life ends? Starting over in a new place where you don\u2019t instantly have something in common with your neighbors and coworkers can be tough\u2014especially if your military career included multiple Permanent Change of Station moves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Those who have successfully transitioned from military to civilian life say that it can be a challenge, but one of the main ways to make it work is to not hide away.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cIt\u2019s all about putting yourself out there,\u201d said Mike Abrams, a lieutenant colonel in the Marine Corps reserves and founder and president of <a href=\"https:\/\/fourblock.org\/\" target=\"_blank\">FourBlock<\/a>. FourBlock is a non-profit that helps military personnel transitioning to civilian life find meaningful employment, but Abrams said at the heart of the mission is building relationships\u2014and those relationships help transitioning service members make connections both in and out of the workplace.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cWe\u2019re working to bridge that military\/civilian divide,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The military can be an insular group, and even though most service men and women were civilians at one point, years in the service can be isolating\u2014making it challenging to maintain relationships with friends and family on the outside.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cI\u2019ve moved 10 times,\u201d said Carla Miller, a military spouse and senior manager and Career Connector for <a href=\"https:\/\/www.hiringourheroes.org\/\" target=\"_blank\">Hiring Our Heroes<\/a>, a program of the U.S. Chamber of Commerce Foundation that connects the military community (servicemembers, their spouses and veterans) with companies for employment opportunities.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">In Miller\u2019s experience, service men and women sometimes struggle to transition after they \u201ctake the uniform off,\u201d so to speak. Military life provides a mission and a purpose, and finding that similar feeling once service is over isn\u2019t always seamless.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cI encourage people to volunteer, build your network at the local level,\u201d Miller said. \u201cJoin a veteran\u2019s group or seek out a veteran\u2019s employee resource group at your job and if one doesn\u2019t exist, start one.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Brynt Parmeter, who retired as a colonel after serving more than 20 years in the U.S. Army, first spent time working in the technology field in California before becoming the Senior Director of Military Programs for Walmart two years ago.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cTransitioning to civilian life can be stressful,\u201d Parmeter said. \u201cYou start to not know who you are outside of the uniform and you can get comfortable in military service.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cYour network is closed and tight.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">For him, and other veterans, branching out and meeting new people isn\u2019t easy, as people have misconceptions about the military and it can be hard to find common ground.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Miller and Parmeter said the key is networking and being willing to take risks and starting up conversations with new people. Starting small\u2014like joining your child\u2019s school PTO or chatting up a neighbor\u2014are some ways to get the ball rolling. Volunteering is a great way to meet people, Miller said, and it also provides the sense of purpose and helping-others aspect that the military provided.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Finding a new community inside of work is something that helps too, Parmeter said. Many companies have employee resource groups for veterans or service men and women, and that can be a great place to make new friends.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Melissa Stirling is the senior director for Military Programs for Hilton and runs its Operation: Opportunity program that places former military personnel within the company. Hilton has several groups for former military personnel and is serious about helping their employees who served make connections\u2014and build their social networks.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cOur groups allow our employees to connect with each other within Hilton,\u201d she said. \u201cAnd the people who have been here for a while look out for the new people to form those social connections so no one feels alone.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Building a social network after leaving the military can be a 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